It is done.

It’s not what you think based on the last two entries.

Our son and his lovely wife got married here, in our backyard.  That is done.

It has taken me a week to unwind and recover.  I am just now returning to myself.  I had no idea how I would do energy wise.  I tried to conserve energy in the week before but I have figured out that there is more than one type of energy and they both seem to drain my battery these days.

You know what I mean about nervous energy?  The kind that makes you extra productive? The kind that that you count on before a big move or a trip or a big deal at work is due?  I use to have that and it was great.  I could pour on the steam and get whatever it was done and then bask in the glow of it afterward.

I don’t get the whole glow thing anymore.  I miss that.  I get more of a need to lie flat and hurt all over kind of thing.  It’s frustrating.  I miss the other me.  I was literally a mess and a bitch last week.  However, if I start at the actual day of the wedding and move forward there was some humor to my fatigue.

My dad, Harold, was a sort of bumbling figure.  I take after him in more than just in  looks.  On the day of the wedding I was tired.  We had stayed up pretty late the night before at the rehearsal just decorating and imbibing.  I don’t imbibe. I mean I haven’t in years.  I did do a bit of it that night and it hit me like a ton of bricks.  I lost motor control and went to bed.  The day of the wedding, as I said, I was tired and there were endless things to worry about and to try and get done.

One of the last things I had decided to fiddle with before I started to get my bath and get ready for the wedding was to string some fairy lights along the rail of the deck that leads down from the steps, right in the middle.  Everyone would be processing from there so I thought it might be nice.  I don’t know what exactly I was doing but I guess I was leaning and I lost my footing.  I tumbled down the stairs in slow motion and landed on the bricks below. I tried to break my fall but was only moderately successful.  I sat there on the bricks and howled.

My husband came out and asked if I was broken.  I really wasn’t sure at first.  I was pretty shaken.  So, I went inside and took something for pain and had a glass of water.  I have never had a bigger egg shaped hematoma and bruise injury in my life! The worst one was on my left leg, where I fell.  It hurt, badly, but I was able to deal with it so I just made do.  As of now, ten days later, it is still a bump, and I have the nastiest bruise I have ever seen, but that’s fine.  I am just a klutz.

So fatigue continued through the week at really took me down, down, down to a literally shitty level.  We animal sat for the new couple whilst they were honeymooning.  They have two birds and a chiweenie puppy named Bean.  Bean is a sweetheart but unfortunately, for her ad for us, she went into heat.  The plan had been to have her spayed before this happened but it sort of snuck up on us.  So my husband and I had never experienced the joys of a bleeding puppy dog.  OY.

The first night we had her, Sunday I guess,it started and we were too stupid to figure it out.  We thought I must have been scratching my weird rash and caused some blood on the bed sheets.  It took another 24 hours and a whole ton of higher education for us to discover where it was really coming from.  We were so dumb! It took another whole day for us to figure out the best way to deal with it.

On Wednesday I did my immune infusion after I got done working. And, because I was fatigued and forgot to premedicate properly, I had horrible side effects.  I was itching like mad and had a headache all night long.  I finally gave up on sleep and went downstairs to stare at the television and mindlessly eat.  I did not turn on the light in the living room.  I just curled up on the couch with my dogs and my food.  Yeah, well, I was eating jam with multiple berries and it looked like a berry had fallen onto a couch pillow.  I picked it up and jammed it into my mouth like the zombie I was.  IT WAS NOT A BERRY.  It was a poop from the dog’s diaper.

I ran to the sink and spat it out and starting rinsing my mouth with hot water and detergent.  OMG I was so freaked out.  I was also laughing at myself.  What a loser!  Only a true idiot could eat dog shit and mistake it for food in the middle of a bad night.  Then I cleaned the poor puppy up.  She had asked to go out and I had not paid attention.  You have to take the diaper off and take her out and then put it back on.  I had been too dopey to follow through: my fault entirely!

So, that was my shitty story.