So, today is the day. Or, at least it is another of those days. I am having a second ERCP. I had one in early January and it was really, really hard but it seemed to work. The dr. cut a hole in my biliary duct, released a lot of pressure and slime and put in a stent. As soon as I got over being really sore, it felt good.
Then the stent came out. And, it hurt like hell again.
So, today we do it again, with a longer stent and hope it holds up. If so, I go to Houston for a more permanent stenting procedure in my pancreas. It is a bit dangerous but could get me more long term relief.
I was scheduled for tomorrow a.m. but the dr. got me into his schedule for this afternoon because I am miserable. I appreciate that.
I have not had anything to eat or drink all day and it is now 2:00. I am thirsty and nauseated and in pain. I want this over with as soon as possible.
I am a bit scared. I wish I didn’t have to do this again.
I feel like I am getting ready to stand in the middle of traffic and hope nothing hits me but I don’t see any alternatives. I have to be brave. I have to keep smile on to keep my family believing that I am fine.
My son is upset and I can’t let him see me stumble.
Only when that sweet hiss of stuff goes to my mouth and veins will I let down.