So, long and icky story short, I was violently ill to my stomach on Friday last.
I was hoping I was cured, so on Saturday, Stan and I ran away. We had a luncheon out and went shopping and then got a hotel room. It was all very relaxing. I actually fell asleep during the movie we rented.
The kids kept calling because our internet was down. It was down forever and a day because ATT is a bunch of clueless dumb asses. I take that back, some were nice dumb asses but some of them had no clue.
Anyway, I fell asleep and it was blissful.
For some reason, I woke up with asthma. I used my inhaler and that set off the pain in side like crazy…. Crazy!
I took pain meds and tried just sitting up. It would not go away.
So, the conclusion of our lovely date night was Stan taking me to ER at Seton NW which was near the hotel.
They were really, nice.
They released me and it got worse and worse and worse. I called the gastro doc who is doing my liver biopsy and he said to go to his hospital and get admitted through ER.
I had Stan drop me off. I knew it would be icky. They have hypochondriac written all over my charts there.
Long story short, I was admitted but treated like I was a problem child. I was told ‘no iv meds for pain.’
The upshot was my CT from the other hospital showed I was terribly constipated. Why did they not tell me that?
It’s MY GUT!
ON Tuesday, I had a four hour test for gastric motility. They gave me radioactive eggs and toast and juice and then, every hour, on the hour, they looked at my stomach with a special Doppler machine. It should show the progress of food through the stomach and down to the intestines. Mine did not move at all.
I have severe gastroparesis.
I am now on a diet of mushy stuff.
Here is what bothered me most: My brother and my husband both said I usually get sick on the weekends.
What is that? What does it mean? Do I try to have gastroparesis? Did I know I had it and whatever else is causing my gastric issues?
That made me feel like crawling in a hole and dying. I ‘get sick’ on the weekends because I CAN’T GET SICK DURING THE WEEK.
I feel like a loser x a loser x a loser.
Someone just let me out of here please. There has been a mistake. I got the wrong body or something and I need an exchange.
Friday is the biopsy on my liver. I don’t want to go.
I am scared of it.
But, hey, it’s the weekend.
Party ON.
Oh sweet girl – no you did not choose any of this. None of this is your fault or choice. You have bits of happiness in the fragments between things and events – maybe that’s all we get – some fragments are bigger than others.